Pouring Out Your Soul to the Lord

“...pouring out my soul before the Lord.” I Samuel 1:15 

In I Samuel 1 we find a troubled Hannah. You see in that time one of the only things a woman could do to have any notoriety was to give birth to a son. But alas, Hannah hasn’t been able to do so. She is barren. Rubbing salt into the wound is her husband’s other wife who has born sons and gives Hannah a bad time about it. Reading between the lines one might guess that this wife is actually jealous of Hannah since her husband seems to love her more shown in how he gives Hannah double portions. 

The men in this story provoke her more. Her husband saying, “Aren’t I better than ten sons.” Then we have Eli, the priest, accusing her of being drunk. He thinks this since when she prays her lips are moving, but no verbal words are coming out. This is because she is deeply distressed. The scripture tells us that she wept bitterly, translated in other Bible versions as having “bitterness of soul.” As she explains it to Eli in her defense she says, “I’ve been pouring out my soul before the Lord.” Later in the Psalms, David will follow her lead saying in Psalms 62:8, “trusting in the Lord at all times and pouring out your heart to him.” 

Hannah has great trust in the Lord here, as she pours out her bitter soul. The word pour here not only means to spill it all out, but it can also be translated as complain. There are times when we just want to rant. Sometimes our good friends will put up with us when we do so. 

Hannah takes her rant, all her sorrow, disappointment, and agitation from the other wife to the Lord. She also promises that if the Lord delivers, she will commit her son to be a Nazarite - a priest. After letting it all out, explaining her actions to the priest, and receiving the priest’s blessings, she returns to her husband and it says her countenance is sad no longer. Letting it all out and giving it over to the Lord is a good way to rid the anxiety and frustrations of our life - finding trust that the Lord will pull you through. 

This story meant so much to me when I was in my mid thirties and still single. I have a younger sister who was already married with two children. I felt unrecognized by my family - a failure as a woman. Reading this story of Hannah and pouring out your heart to God helped me through until I met my husband at thirty-five, was married and had two sons. But even married and finally having children, there have been many times since then when I had to pour out my heart to God. 

Hannah’s happy ending is that she conceives and gives birth to Samuel who becomes the great high priest who anoints David to the throne. 

May we, like Hannah, have the faith when we are distressed to pour out our souls before the Lord - giving it all over to the Lord with trust that God can move us beyond our sorrows into hope of deliverance. Amen

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